Seeing virtues in faults: Negativity and the transformation of interpersonal narratives in close relationships.

It is proposed that individuals develop story-like representations of their romantic partners that quell feelings of doubt engendered by their partners' faults. In Study 1, dating individuals were induced to depict their partners as rarely initiating disagreements over joint interests. Such conflict avoidance was then turned into a fault. In scaled questionnaires and open-ended narratives, low-conflict individuals then constructed images of conflict-engaging partners. These results suggest that storytelling depends on considerable flexibility in construal as low-conflict Ss possessed little evidence of conflict in their relationships. Study 2 further examined the construal processes underlying people's ability to transform the meaning of negativity in their stories (e.g., seeing virtues in faults). Paradoxically, positive representations of a partner may exist, not in spite of a partner's faults, but because of these imperfections. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Through the looking glass darkly? When self-doubts turn into relationship insecurities.

The authors argue that individuals regulate perceptions of their relationships in a self-protective way, finding virtue in their partners only when they feel confident that their partners also see virtues in them. In 4 experiments, the authors posed an acute threat to low and high self-esteem individuals' feelings of self-worth (e.g., guilt about a transgression, fears of being inconsiderate or intellectually inept). They then collected measures of confidence in the partner's positive regard and acceptance (i.e., reflected appraisals) and perceptions of the partner. The results revealed that low self-esteem individuals reacted to self-doubt with heightened doubts about their partners' regard, which then tarnished impressions of their partners. In contrast, high self-esteem individuals reacted to self-doubts by becoming more convinced of their partners' continued acceptance, using their relationships as a resource for self-affirmation. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Emotional communication in close relationships.

Investigated emotional communication patterns characterizing interactions between partners in close relationships by asking 29 couples who were married or living together to engage in a videotaped discussion of a problem they were having in their relationship. In a later session, partners identified specific communications that they believed had an important influence on the discussion and then rated the communications in terms of the feelings the communicator intended to convey and the recipient's reaction. All Ss attempted to reciprocate both the positive and negative feelings that they perceived their partner to express toward them; however, only negative feelings were actually reciprocated. This was because Ss were sensitive to differences in the negative feelings their partners reported expressing and interpreted those feelings correctly, but they were inaccurate in perceiving their partners' expressions of positive feelings. Men interpreted their partners' failures to express love as an indication of hostility, whereas women interpreted their partners' lack of hostility as an indication of love. Results were conceptualized in terms of a general model of emotional communication. Parameters of the model pertaining to the hostility of partners' communications were often related to women's satisfaction with their relationship and their beliefs about relationships in general. However, they were unrelated to men's satisfaction and general beliefs, suggesting that women are generally more adversely affected by overt expressions of hostility than are men. (33 ref) (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

When accuracy hurts: Reactions of anxious–ambivalent dating partners to a relationship-threatening situation.

Why are anxious–ambivalent individuals especially likely to have turbulent and unstable relationships? To help answer this question, the authors use 3 theoretical perspectives to examine how heightened empathic accuracy in a relationship-threatening situation is associated with personal and relational distress. Dating couples inferred their partners' thoughts and feelings from a videotaped interaction which they each rated slides of opposite-sex individuals. Highly anxious–ambivalent individuals were more empathically accurate in this relationship-threatening situation; however, their self-reported thoughts and feelings indicated greater distress and less confidence in their partners and relationships. The more anxious–ambivalent women reported a slight decrease in the perceived closeness of the relationships. Four months later, more anxious–ambivalent men's relationships were more likely to have ended. These findings are discussed in terms of their theoretical and applied implications. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Influence of HIV status and age on cognitive representations of others

In 2 studies the postulate that the perception of time left in life influences the ways that people conceptualize social relationships was explored. It was hypothesized that when time is limited, emotional aspects of relationships are highly salient. In Study 1, a card-sort paradigm involving similarity judgments demonstrated, for a sample of persons 18 to 88 years old, that the prominence of affect in the mental representations of prospective social partners is positively associated with age. In Study 2, the same experimental approach was applied to a sample of young gay men similar to one another in age, but notably different in their health status (that is, HIV negative; HIV positive, asymptomatic; and HIV positive, symptomatic). It was found that, with age held constant, increasing closeness to the end of life is also associated with an increasing prominence of affect in the mental representations of social partners. The results suggest that the perception of limited time, rather than chronological age, is the critical variable influencing mental representations of social partners.     

Working models of attachment and reactions to different forms of caregiving from romantic partners.

Inspired by attachment theory, the authors tested a series of theoretically derived predictions about connections between attachment working models (attachment to one's parents assessed by the Adult Attachment Interview; M. Main & R. Goldwyn, 1994) and the effectiveness of specific types of caregiving spontaneously displayed by dating partners during a stressful conflict-resolution discussion. Each partner first completed the Adult Attachment Interview. One week later, each couple was videotaped while they tried to resolve a current problem in their relationship. Trained observers then rated each interaction for the degree to which (a) emotional, instrumental, and physical caregiving behaviors were displayed; (b) care recipients appeared calmed by their partners' caregiving attempts; and (c) each partner appeared distressed during the discussion. Individuals who had more secure representations of their parents were rated as being more calmed if/when their partners provided greater emotional care, especially if they were rated as more distressed. Conversely, individuals who had more insecure (dismissive) representations of their parents reacted more favorably to instrumental caregiving behaviors from their partners, especially if they were more distressed. The broader theoretical implications of these findings are discussed. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

More than words: Reframing compliments from romantic partners fosters security in low self-esteem individuals.

Although people with low self-esteem (LSEs) doubt their value to their romantic partners, they tend to resist positive feedback from their partners. This resistance undermines their relationships and has been difficult to overcome in past research. The authors investigated whether LSEs could be induced to take their partners' kind words to heart by manipulating how abstractly they described a recent compliment. In 3 studies, LSEs felt more positively about the compliments, about themselves, and about their relationships--as positively as people with high self-esteem (HSEs) felt--when they were encouraged to describe the meaning and significance of the compliments. The effects of this abstract meaning manipulation were still evident 2 weeks later. Thus, when prompted, LSEs can reframe affirmations from their partners to be as meaningful as HSEs generally believe them to be and, consequently, can feel just as secure and satisfied with their romantic relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Uncertainty orientation and trust in close relationships: Individual differences in cognitive styles.

Because coping with uncertainty is an important aspect of close relationships and is critical to issues of trust, the authors expected individual differences in uncertainty orientation to play a central role in shaping people's representations of their relationships. For a 3-week period, 77 couples completed a series of questionnaires and kept diaries on their interactions. As expected, certainty-oriented persons' need for cognitive closure resulted in either high or low trust for their partners, whereas uncertainty-oriented persons typically attained only a moderate level of trust. Several other measures indicated that certainty-oriented partners found their relationships most aversive under moderate trust. Memory data indicated that certainty-oriented individuals, but not uncertainty-oriented individuals, used conclusions about trust as a heuristic for reconstructing the past in ways that maintained cognitive clarity. Uncertainty orientation also combined with gender in many interesting ways. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

The benefits of positive illusions: Idealization and the construction of satisfaction in close relationships.

It is proposed that satisfaction is associated with idealistic, rather than realistic, perceptions of one's partner. To provide baselines for assessing relationship illusions, both members of married and dating heterosexual couples were asked to rate themselves and their partners on a variety of interpersonal attributes. Participants also rated the typical and ideal partner on these attributes. Path analyses revealed that individuals' impressions of their partners were more a mirror of their self-images and ideals than a reflection of their partners' self-reported attributes. Overall, intimates saw their partners in a more positive light than their partners saw themselves. Furthermore, these idealized constructions predicted greater satisfaction. Individuals were happier in their relationships when they idealized their partners and their partners idealized them. Taken together, these results suggest that a certain degree of idealization or illusion may be a critical feature of satisfying dating and even marital relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Depressive symptoms and close relationships during the transition to adulthood: Perspectives from dysphoric women, their best friends, and their romantic partners.

Late adolescent women's depressive symptoms and interpersonal functioning were assessed using reports from participants, their best friends, and their romantic partners. As predicted, the associations between relationship dysfunction and dysphoria were stronger in romantic relationships than in friendships. Unlike friends, romantic partners perceived dysphoric women as having poorer social skills. Romantic partners also reported providing less emotional support to dysphoric women, whereas friends reported providing more. Finally, romantic partners of dysphoric women had more Cluster A (odd-eccentric) personality disorder symptoms; these symptoms mediated the relation between women's depression and partners' nonsupportiveness. The findings suggest that dysphoric women may find themselves in emotionally nonsupportive romantic relationships because they have paired (through assortative pairing or mutual influence) with symptomatic partners. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

The self-fulfilling nature of positive illusions in romantic relationships: Love is not blind, but prescient.

It is proposed that satisfying, stable relationships reflect intimates' ability to see imperfect partners in idealized ways. In this study of long-term benefits (or possible costs) of positive illusions, both members of dating couples completed measures of idealization and well-being 3 times in a year. Path analyses revealed that idealization had a variety of self-fulfilling effects. Relationships were most likely to persist—even in the face of conflicts and doubts—when intimates idealized one another the most. Intimates who idealized one another more initially also reported relatively greater increases in satisfaction on and decreases in conflicts and doubts over the year. Finally, individuals even came to share their partners' idealized images of them. In summary, intimates who idealized one another appeared more prescient than blind, actually creating the relationships they wished for as romances progressed. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

A comparison of young children's understanding of contradictory representations in pretense, memory, and belief

The present study examined the nature of young children's understanding of various mental representations. 3- and 4-year-olds were presented with story protagonists who held mental representations (beliefs, pretenses, and memories) that contradicted reality. Subjects chose 1 of 2 alternate "thought pictures" (depicting either the mental representation or reality) that reflected the mental state. While 4-year-olds performed relatively well on all scenario types, 3-year-olds chose the correct thought picture significantly more often for pretense and memory scenarios than for false belief scenarios. These results suggest that young children conceptualize pretense as involving mental representations, and that they have more difficulty understanding contradictory mental representations that purport to correspond to reality.     

Implications of rejection sensitivity for intimate relationships.

People who are sensitive to social rejection tend to anxiously expect, readily perceive, and overreact to it. This article shows that this cognitive-affective processing disposition undermines intimate relationships. Study 1 describes a measure that operationalizes the anxious-expectations component of rejection sensitivity. Study 2 provides experimental evidence that people who anxiously expect rejection readily perceive intentional rejection in the ambiguous behavior of others. Study 3 shows that people who enter romantic relationships with anxious expectations of rejection readily perceive intentional rejection in the insensitive behavior of their new partners. Study 4 demonstrates that rejection-sensitive people and their romantic partners are dissatisfied with their relationships. Rejection-sensitive men's jealousy and rejection-sensitive women's hostility and diminished supportiveness help explain their partners' dissatisfaction. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Adjustment to a dyadic stressor: A longitudinal study of coping and depressive symptoms in infertile couples over an insemination attempt.

In a study designed to examine how intimate partners' coping processes with regard to infertility predicted depressive symptoms across the course of a treatment cycle, 43 couples completed assessments in the week prior to and the week after receiving a negative pregnancy result from an alternate insemination attempt by the partner. Depressive symptoms in both partners increased significantly after the pregnancy result receipt. As hypothesized, avoidant coping predicted increased distress over time, and approach-oriented coping (e.g., problem-focused coping, emotional processing, and expression) predicted decreased distress. Coping strategies engaged in by both individuals and partners predicted depressive symptoms, and for women, interactions also emerged between their own and their partners' coping. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Self-monitoring and dating relationships.

Four investigations, with 479 university students, examined the involvement of self-monitoring propensities in dating relationships. Studies 1 and 2 examined willingness to change dating partners and form close, intimate dating relationships with other partners. Only Ss high in self-monitoring, as measured by the Self-Monitoring Scale, were willing to terminate current relationships in favor of alternative partners. In Study 3, for those involved in multiple dating relationships, high self-monitoring Ss reported having dated a greater number of partners in the preceding year than low self-monitoring Ss; for those in steady, exclusive dating relationships, low self-monitoring Ss reported having dated their current partner for considerably longer than high self-monitoring individuals. Study 4 examined growth of intimacy in dating relationships. The link between length of relationship and level of intimacy was more pronounced for low than high self-monitoring Ss. Findings suggest that high self-monitoring individuals adopt an "uncommitted" and low self-monitoring individuals a "committed" orientation toward dating relationships. Implications for understanding the evolution of intimate relationships, including marital ones, are discussed. (17 ref) (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Not “capitalizing” on social capitalization interactions: The role of attachment insecurity.

Capitalization interactions, in which partners share positive events, typically produce positive relationship outcomes (Gable, Gonzaga, & Strachman, 2006). However, the limiting conditions of these interactions have not been examined. In this study, 101 dating couples discussed a positive event in the life of each partner. Ratings of perceived responsiveness were made by both the romantic partner who disclosed a positive event and his/her responding partner. Trained observers then rated each videotaped interaction. More avoidantly attached responders reported being and were rated by coders as less responsive, particularly if their disclosing partners were more anxiously attached. Avoidantly attached individuals also underestimated their partners' responsiveness relative to observer ratings. Anxious responders underestimated their own responsiveness when their disclosing partners were more avoidantly attached. These results indicate that insecurely attached individuals are relatively less likely to be responsive and to perceive responsiveness in capitalization interactions than are more securely attached individuals. This is especially true when highly anxious and highly avoidant individuals are relationship partners. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Kindred spirits? The benefits of egocentrism in close relationships.

The authors argue that people are happiest in their relationships when they believe they have found a kindred spirit, someone who understands them and shares their experiences. As reality may not always be that accommodating, however, intimates may find this sense of confidence by egocentrically assuming that their partners are mirrors of themselves. Both members of dating and married couples completed measures of satisfaction and felt understanding. They also described their own and their partners' traits, values, and day-to-day feelings. The results revealed that people in satisfying and stable relationships assimilated their partners to themselves, perceiving similarities that were not evident in reality. Such egocentrism predicted greater feelings of being understood, and feeling understood mediated the link between egocentrism and satisfaction in marriage. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

The self-fulfilling prophecy in close relationships: rejection sensitivity and rejection by romantic partners

The authors hypothesized a self-fulfilling prophecy wherein rejection expectancies lead people to behave in ways that elicit rejection from their dating partners. The hypothesis was tested in 2 studies of conflict in couples: (a) a longitudinal field study where couples provided daily-diary reports and (b) a lab study involving behavioral observations. Results from the field study showed that high rejection-sensitive (HRS) people's relationships were more likely to break up than those of low rejection-sensitive (LRS) people. Conflict processes that contribute to relationship erosion were revealed for HRS women but not for HRS men. Following naturally occurring relationship conflicts, HRS women's partners were more rejecting than were LRS women's partners. The lab study showed that HRS women's negative behavior during conflictual discussions helped explain their partners' more rejecting postconflict responses.     

The concept of mental representations in light of recent infant research.

Juxtaposes psychoanalytic thought with recent infant research to develop an understanding of the term mental representation. A definition of mental representations as unconscious organizing structures of interactions is proposed as a comprehensive integration of the various points of view on this issue. The psychoanalytic view of representations is presented, along with revisions suggested by extensions of theory within psychoanalysis and developmental research. Several points of divergence are discussed, including the issue of self–object differentiation, the caretaker–child dyad as the focus of analysis, and the capacity within the first year for emergent structures that allow the infant to develop interpersonal expectations. Influences of Piaget's theory of representation on each body of thought are also addressed. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)