Optimizing assurance: The risk regulation system in relationships.

A model of risk regulation is proposed to explain how people balance the goal of seeking closeness to a romantic partner against the opposing goal of minimizing the likelihood and pain of rejection. The central premise is that confidence in a partner's positive regard and caring allows people to risk seeking dependence and connectedness. The risk regulation system consists of 3 interconnected "if-then" contingency rules, 1 cognitive, 1 affective, and 1 behavioral. The authors describe how general perceptions of a partner's regard structure the sensitivity of these 3 "if-then" rules in risky relationship situations. The authors then describe the consequences of such situated "if-then" rules for relationship well-being and conclude by integrating other theoretical perspectives and outlining future research directions. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Attachment and the experience and expression of emotions in romantic relationships: A developmental perspective.

In this longitudinal study, the authors tested a developmental hypothesis derived from attachment theory and recent empirical findings. Target participants were 78 individuals who have been studied intensively from infancy into their mid-20s. When targets were 20-23 years old, the authors tested the way in which interpersonal experiences at 3 pivotal points in each target's earlier social development--infancy/early childhood, early elementary school, and adolescence--predicted the pattern of positive versus negative emotions experienced with his or her romantic partner. A double-mediation model revealed that targets classified as securely attached at 12 months old were rated as more socially competent during early elementary school by their teachers. Targets' social competence, in turn, forecasted their having more secure relationships with close friends at age 16, which in turn predicted more positive daily emotional experiences in their adult romantic relationships (both self- and partner-reported) and less negative affect in conflict resolution and collaborative tasks with their romantic partners (rated by observers). These results are discussed in terms of attachment theory and how antecedent life experiences may indirectly shape events in current relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Seeking security or growth: A regulatory focus perspective on motivations in romantic relationships.

Using a multimethod approach, we examined how regulatory focus shapes people's perceptual, behavioral, and emotional responses in different situations in romantic relationships. We first examined how chronic regulatory focus affects romantic partners' support perceptions and problem-solving behaviors while they were engaged in a conflict resolution discussion (Study 1). Next, we experimentally manipulated regulatory focus and tested its effects on partner perceptions when individuals recalled a prior conflict resolution discussion (Study 2). We then examined how chronic regulatory focus influences individuals' emotional responses to hypothetical relationship events (Study 3) and identified specific partner behaviors to which people should respond with regulatory goal-congruent emotions (Study 4). Strongly prevention-focused people perceived their partners as more distancing and less supportive during conflict (Studies 1 and 2), approached conflict resolution by discussing the details related to the conflict (Study 1), and experienced a negative relationship outcome with more agitation (Study 3). Strongly promotion-focused people perceived their partners as more supportive and less distancing (Studies 1 and 2), displayed more creative conflict resolution behavior (Study 1), and experienced a negative relationship outcome with more sadness and a favorable outcome with more positive emotions (Study 3). In Study 4, recalling irresponsible and responsible partner behaviors was associated with experiencing more prevention-focused emotions, whereas recalling affectionate and neglectful partner behaviors was associated with more promotion-focused emotions. The findings show that regulatory focus and approach–avoidance motivations influence certain interpersonal processes in similar ways, but regulatory focus theory also generates novel predictions on which approach–avoidance models are silent. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Kindred spirits? The benefits of egocentrism in close relationships.

The authors argue that people are happiest in their relationships when they believe they have found a kindred spirit, someone who understands them and shares their experiences. As reality may not always be that accommodating, however, intimates may find this sense of confidence by egocentrically assuming that their partners are mirrors of themselves. Both members of dating and married couples completed measures of satisfaction and felt understanding. They also described their own and their partners' traits, values, and day-to-day feelings. The results revealed that people in satisfying and stable relationships assimilated their partners to themselves, perceiving similarities that were not evident in reality. Such egocentrism predicted greater feelings of being understood, and feeling understood mediated the link between egocentrism and satisfaction in marriage. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Predictors of caregiving in adult intimate relationships: An attachment theoretical perspective.

Romantic couples (N?=?194) participated in an investigation of caregiving processes in adulthood. In Phase 1, couple members completed questionnaires designed to identify attachment style differences in caregiving behavior and to explore the underlying (personal and relationship) mechanisms that lead people with different attachment styles to be effective or ineffective caregivers. Results revealed that social support knowledge, prosocial orientation, interdependence, trust, and egoistic motivation mediated the link between attachment style and caregiving. In Phase 2, responsive caregiving was assessed behaviorally by exposing one member of the couple to a stressful laboratory situation and experimentally manipulating his or her need for support. Results revealed that attachment style and mediating mechanisms identified in Phase 1 also predicted observable support behavior in a specific episode in which a partner had a clear need for support. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

A close look at conflictual supervisory relationships: The trainee's perspective.

In a qualitative study of negative supervision, 13 master's and doctoral trainees were interviewed about a supervision experience that had a detrimental effect on their training. Many supervisors were described as not being invested in the relationship and as being unwilling to own their role in conflicts. Many trainees described being overworked without proper supervision, some felt expected to support their supervisors, and many underwent extreme stress and self-doubt. Most participants reported ongoing power struggles with angry supervisors, and most relied on peers, other professionals, and therapists for support. Qualitative themes were consistent with trainees' high scores on the Role Conflict and Role Ambiguity Inventory (M.E. Olk & M.L. Friedlander, 1992) and with their low ratings of their supervisors' attractiveness and interpersonal sensitivity on the Supervisory Styles Inventory (M.L. Friedlander & L.G. Ward, 1984). (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Optimism in close relationships: How seeing things in a positive light makes them so.

Does expecting positive outcomes--especially in important life domains such as relationships--make these positive outcomes more likely? In a longitudinal study of dating couples, the authors tested whether optimists (who have a cognitive disposition to expect positive outcomes) and their romantic partners are more satisfied in their relationships, and if so, whether this is due to optimists perceiving greater support from their partners. In cross-sectional analyses, both optimists and their partners indicated greater relationship satisfaction, an effect that was mediated by optimists' greater perceived support. When the couples engaged in a conflict conversation, optimists and their partners saw each other as engaging more constructively during the conflict, which in turn led both partners to feel that the conflict was better resolved 1 week later. In a 1-year follow-up, men's optimism predicted relationship status. Effects of optimism were mediated by the optimists' perceived support, which appears to promote a variety of beneficial processes in romantic relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

The anxiety-buffering function of close relationships: Evidence that relationship commitment acts as a terror management mechanism.

Three studies examined the terror management function of romantic commitment. In Study 1 (N=94), making mortality salient led to higher reports of romantic commitment on the Dimensions of Commitment Inventory (J. M. Adams & W. H. Jones, 1997) than control conditions. In Study 2 (N=60), the contextual salience of thoughts about romantic commitment reduced the effects of mortality salience on judgments of social transgressions. In Study 3 (N=100), the induction of thoughts about problems in romantic relationships led to higher accessibility of death-related thoughts than did the induction of thoughts about either academic problems or a neutral theme. The findings expand terror management theory, emphasizing the anxiety-buffering function of close relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Self-determination and conflict in romantic relationships.

Four studies examined associations between E. L. Deci and R. M. Ryan's (1985, 2000) construct of autonomy, responses to relationship disagreements, and dissatisfaction after conflict. In Study 1, diary data showed that trait autonomy predicted relationship autonomy, which in turn predicted relative satisfaction after disagreements. In Study 2, trait autonomy predicted relationship autonomy, which was associated with less defensive and more understanding responses to conflict. Studies 3 and 4 examined whether one's partner's relationship autonomy uniquely predicted reported and observed behavior during conflict. Autonomous reasons for being in the relationship (of both self and partner) predicted both reported and observed responses to conflict and feelings of satisfaction. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Time counts: Future time perspective, goals, and social relationships.

On the basis of postulates derived from socioemotional selectivity theory, the authors explored the extent to which future time perspective (FTP) is related to social motivation, and to the composition and perceived quality of personal networks. Four hundred eighty German participants with ages ranging from 20 to 90 yrs took part in the study. In 2 card-sort tasks, participants indicated their partner preference and goal priority. Participants also completed questionnaires on personal networks and social satisfaction. Older people, as a group, perceived their future time as more limited than younger people. Individuals who perceived future time as being limited prioritized emotionally meaningful goals, whereas individuals who perceived their futures as open-ended prioritized instrumental or knowledge-related goals. Priority of goal domains was found to be differently associated with the size, composition, and perceived quality of personal networks depending on FTP. Prioritizing emotion-regulatory goals was associated with greater social satisfaction and less perceived strain with others when participants perceived their future as limited. Findings underscore the importance of FTP in the self-regulation of social relationships and the subjective experience associated with them. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Reflections on the costs and benefits of exacting revenge in romantic relationships.

The present investigation explored individuals' (N = 58) retrospective accounts of the costs and benefits associated with acts of revenge they had committed against a current or past romantic partner. Content analysis of participants' responses to a semistructured interview revealed that, consistent with claims that revenge can have constructive as well as destructive consequences, participants described both good and bad outcomes associated with their vengeful acts. There was little evidence, however, that they perceived the consequences of revenge as achieving prosocial ends (i.e., as having benefited their partners/relationships or others) and, overall, participants seemed to believe that they, rather than others, had profited from their vengeful actions. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Generativity and spiritual disclosure in close relationships.

This exploratory study examines the link between generativity and an interpersonal aspect of religion and spirituality, spiritual disclosure, in close relationships. Three hundred seventy-eight adults aged 18 to 85 years were asked about their use of spiritual disclosure with close friends, views on their own generativity, questions related to personality characteristics, and level of general self-disclosure. This community sample’s reports on higher levels of spiritual disclosure were tied to higher levels of generativity and general self-disclosure. Spiritual disclosure also predicted unique variance in generativity beyond general self-disclosure, personality, and intrapersonal aspects of religion and spirituality. These findings suggest spiritual disclosure in close relationships is an important part of the religious/spiritual landscape, which merits further study in relation to generativity and other prosocial indices. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Assessing decision making in young adult romantic relationships.

Romantic relationships among young adults are rich with ambiguity and without a clear, universal progression emphasizing the need for active decision making. Lack of active decision making in romantic relationships can lead to increases in constraints (e.g. pregnancy, shared living space or finances) that promote the continuation of relationships that would have otherwise ended, leading to increased risk of relationship distress. Because there is no available assessment of thoughtfulness regarding relationship decisions, the authors of the present studies report data on the development of one such scale, the Relationship Deciding Scale (RDS). Study 1 (N = 995) reveals the factor structure of the RDS and provides reliability data for the emergent subscales. In Study 2 (N = 963), the obtained three-factor structure (Relationship Confidence, Knowledge of Warning Signs, and Deciding) is tested via confirmatory factor analysis, demonstrates convergent and discriminant validity, and is shown to predict relationship characteristics 14 weeks later. Study 3 (N = 805) shows the sensitivity of the three factors to change through examination of the influence of a semester-long intervention targeted at increasing decision making in relationships. Use of this scale for identifying and intervening with couples or individuals who lack active decision making in relationships may decrease their risk for future relationship distress. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Parental attachment and romantic relationships: Associations with emotional disturbance during late adolescence.

In this study, the authors examined cross-sectional and longitudinal associations between late adolescents' parental attachment and emotional disturbance. Specifically, they investigated whether associations between parental attachment and emotional disturbance were less strong for adolescents with romantic partners, and whether the quality and duration of romantic relationships were related to adolescents' emotional disturbance. Data were collected from 568 adolescents, ages 15-19, interviewed in 1994 and 1997. Cross-sectional analyses showed significant associations between parental attachment and emotional disturbance, but no systematic longitudinal relationships were found. Links cross-sectionally, but not longitudinally, between parental attachment and emotional disturbance were less strong for youths with romantic partners. Neither the quality nor the duration of romantic relationships was related to emotional disturbance in this age group. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Let's get serious: Communicating commitment in romantic relationships.

Are men or women more likely to confess love first in romantic relationships? And how do men and women feel when their partners say “I love you”? An evolutionary–economics perspective contends that women and men incur different potential costs and gain different potential benefits from confessing love. Across 6 studies testing current and former romantic relationships, we found that although people think that women are the first to confess love and feel happier when they receive such confessions, it is actually men who confess love first and feel happier when receiving confessions. Consistent with predictions from our model, additional studies have shown that men's and women's reactions to love confessions differ in important ways depending on whether the couple has engaged in sexual activity. These studies have demonstrated that saying and hearing “I love you” has different meanings depending on who is doing the confessing and when the confession is being made. Beyond romantic relationships, an evolutionary–economics perspective suggests that displays of commitment in other types of relationships—and reactions to these displays—will be influenced by specific, functional biases. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2011 APA, all rights reserved)     

Through the eyes of love: Reality and illusion in intimate relationships.

This article reviews the research literature and theory concerned with accuracy of judgments in romantic relationships. We initially propose a model of cognition in (romantic) relationships that distinguishes between 2 forms of accuracy: mean-level bias and tracking accuracy. We then report the results of meta-analyses of research on heterosexual, romantic relationships, which used external benchmarks and reported levels of tracking accuracy (98 studies) and/or mean-level bias (48 studies). The results revealed robust overall effect sizes for both tracking accuracy (r = .47) and positive mean-level bias (r = .09). As expected, the effects were substantial and positive for tracking accuracy across 6 judgmental categories, whereas signed mean-level bias was negative for the interaction attributions (e.g., love, communication). The results showed, as expected, that these 2 forms of accuracy were independent—the 2 kinds of effect size derived from the same set of 38 studies were uncorrelated. As expected, gender, relationship length, and relationship evaluations moderated mean-level bias across studies but (unexpectedly) not for tracking accuracy. In the Discussion we evaluate the prior model in light of the findings, other research, moderating variables (such as self-esteem), the role of projection, the early stages of mate selection, metacognition, and the rationality and nature of motivated cognition. We conclude that our model, findings, and analyses help to resolve the apparent paradox that love is both riven with illusions and rooted in reality, and support both evolutionary and social psychological approaches to understanding cognition in romantic relationships. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Intergenerational transmission of aggression in romantic relationships: The moderating role of attachment security.

This prospective study used longitudinal, multi-reporter data to examine the influence of parents’ marital relationship functioning on subsequent adolescent romantic relationships. Consistent with Bryant and Conger’s (2002) model for the Development of Early Adult Romantic Relationships (DEARR), we found that interactional styles, more specifically paternal aggression and satisfaction, exhibited in parents’ marital relationship when their adolescents were age 13 were predictive of qualities of the adolescent’s romantic relationships 5 years later. Continuities were domain specific: paternal satisfaction predicted adolescent satisfaction and paternal aggression predicted adolescent aggression. Attachment security moderated the link between paternal aggression and subsequent adolescent aggression, with continuities between negative conflictual styles across relationships reduced for secure adolescents. Results are interpreted as suggesting that attachment may help attenuated the transmission of destructive conflict strategies across generations. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Beyond global sociosexual orientations: A more differentiated look at sociosexuality and its effects on courtship and romantic relationships.

Sociosexuality is usually assessed as the overall orientation toward uncommitted sex, although this global approach may mask unique contributions of different components. In a large online study (N = 2,708) and a detailed behavioral assessment of 283 young adults (both singles and couples) with a 1-year follow-up, the authors established 3 theoretically meaningful components of sociosexuality: past behavioral experiences, the attitude toward uncommitted sex, and sociosexual desire (all measured by a revised version of the Sociosexual Orientation Inventory). Discriminant validity was shown with regard to (a) their factorial structure, (b) sex differences, (c) many established correlates of sociosexuality, and (d) the prediction of observed flirting behavior when meeting an attractive opposite-sex stranger, even down to the level of objectively coded behaviors, as well as (e) the self-reported number of sexual partners and (f) changes in romantic relationship status over the following year. Within couples, the 3 components also showed distinct degrees of assortative mating and distinct effects on the romantic partner. Implications for the evolutionary psychology of mating tactics are discussed. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Conflict in close relationships: An attachment perspective.

This study investigated how perceptions of current dating partners and relationships change after people with different attachment orientations attempt to resolve a problem in their relationship. Dating couples were videotaped while they tried to resolve either a major or a minor problem. Confirming predictions from attachment theory, men and women who had a more ambivalent orientation perceived their partner and relationship in relatively less positive terms after discussing a major problem. Observer ratings revealed that more ambivalent women who tried to resolve a major problem displayed particularly strong stress and anxiety and engaged in more negative behaviors. Conversely, men with a more avoidant orientation were rated as less warm and supportive, especially if they discussed a major problem. These results are discussed in terms of how highly ambivalent and highly avoidant people differentially perceive and respond to distressing events. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)     

Romantic love and sexual desire in close relationships.

Drawing on recent claims in the study of relationships, attachment, and emotion, the authors hypothesized that romantic love serves a commitment-related function and sexual desire a reproduction-related function. Consistent with these claims, in Study 1, brief experiences of romantic love and sexual desire observed in a 3-min interaction between romantic partners were related to distinct feeling states, distinct nonverbal displays, and commitment- and reproductive-related relationship outcomes, respectively. In Study 2, the nonverbal display of romantic love was related to the release of oxytocin. Discussion focuses on the place of romantic love and sexual desire in the literature on emotion. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2010 APA, all rights reserved)